


haunted by the ghost of you

by orphan_account



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 08:07:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21267797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: When he falls asleep, Mike dreams of seeing them.





	haunted by the ghost of you

Mike doesn't cry when it happens. He remembers wanting to, but he couldn't. That night was a sleepless one, too many thoughts in his head all at once.

The beginning of summer had started with electricity, something he had been longing for from her, the one of a kind love you're always wishing upon. He remembers waiting to see her, the warmth of her hug, the feeling of every word she spoke. 

He hadn't lost faith in Eleven. Not once. Mike had known she was there, felt it in his bones, and she was right in front of him the whole time. Watching. Knowing. Understanding. That wasn't something you could just make up. They were connected in ways he couldn't explain, he'd known that he was in love since day one. 

He loved her for everything she was, and whatever she may become. 

But he went too fast. He rushed into exactly what he shouldn't have, and he was naive for it. Young and naive. Loving her doesn't mean keeping her away from everything else, loving her doesn't mean that he gets to keep her from finding herself, and he should've understood that from the start. It was never about that when it began. Mike had been greedy and unreasonable.

To put it simply, he'd been an asshole. That much was clear, but it wasn't who he was, and it wasn't going to be ever again. 

All too differently, he begins to remember the apology he'd given Will weeks before, when he told Will that he really hadn't meant it. And when Will had held his hand so gently to let him know it was going to be alright. He remembers the tears welling up in Will's eyes when he said he'd just wanted his friends back, for his childhood to be whole again. 

He hadn't been able to tell Will how he truely felt. Instead, he only managed to get out 'I know'. It wasn't his proudest moment.

Mike can recall the way Will hugged him perfectly. He thought Will looked so pretty that day, even with tears in his eyes, and he'd hugged him so tightly. Will could've held onto him forever and he would've let him.

The end of summer left him with a heavy heart.

Even though he would've understood if Eleven had left without another word, their encounter had resulted in a much needed reassurance; "Mike, I love you too."

She looked so beautiful when she said it. When they kissed, he could feel his heart race, and he regrets not holding her close, not telling her again and again that he loved her, but he knew he wouldn't have been able to.

He never wanted them to go. But he knew it was what they needed. They needed hope, and their town wasn't the place for that. Nobody could blame the Byers for leaving Hawkins behind.

It's been a couple of months. Mike has been trying to find different ways to cope with what he's going through. If he's honest, it's not helping. Neither is his family. 

Nancy tries, he can tell, but it's so awkward. And she's gotta be going through it herself, he knows exactly how she's feeling. It's just too quiet in their house. His mom is barely around, and when she is, she's busy, her promises of being there to talk whenever long gone. His dad can't be bothered to do much. Mike suddenly can't remember a time when their house was lively. Or when it really felt like Home.

Lucas and Dustin are always trying to cheer him up when they get a chance. Lucas notices that he's not the same. None of them are, but Lucas has Max, Dustin has Suzie, and Mike finally knows what it's like to be a third wheel. Actually, Dustin isn't talking to Suzie all the time. Sometimes he's free to do whatever, atleast when she's not nagging him. 

Max hasn't been the same since Billy died, and he doesn't need to ask why. They weren't used to being nice to eachother, but some days, it's easier for them to ignore it, whether it be her teaching him how to skateboard, or him inviting her over for party activities, or them interacting without arguing in general. He apologized to her a while back for the way he treated her, and he knows in the near future it'll be bickering all over again. He doesn't mind. 

Even though life is going okay, Mike isn't alright. There's not a day that goes by where he's not thinking of them. It's so easy for him to regret his decisions, for not being strong enough to say what he knows he should, and it's easy to blame himself. He needs to be able to express himself better. He knows. But saying what he's thinking is.. tough. It's always been like that.

It could be because his childhood wasn't always spent smiling and having fun and playing dnd with his friends. Maybe the reasoning for his inner problems is obvious, because he'd never even heard an I love you as a kid, never once saw his parents truely happy with one another, never understood how to open up. It could be a lot of things. 

Tonight, Mike lays in his bed. He thinks about El and Will, and he holds his pillow close to his chest. For the first time in a long, long while, he cries. He feels the tears coming far too late. 

There's this feeling settling in his stomach. Like maybe it's gonna be okay. In that moment, he holds onto the feeling tightly, wherever it came from, and trusts it. It's almost like he can feel her telling him it's alright, he'll be okay. Just a little while longer.

When he falls asleep, Mike dreams of seeing them.

**Author's Note:**

> twitter @.devilsconfidant


End file.
